Police in Oregon, USA, saw drunken Sean McDowell, 24, picking up the 1.3m (4ft) tall toy outside a shop and simulate sex with it twice.
'He was pretty enamoured with it and decided he was taking it home,' said Sergeant Bob Smith.
'Then he turns and sees one of our officers and he puts the giraffe down and walks away. Later in the evening, he did it again. Maybe he had struck out with all the women at the bar and this giraffe was looking pretty good.'
The poor giraffe belongs to the Bug A Boo children's store and was removed to a place of safety at the station.
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A wise man sees failure as progress/
a fool divorces his knowledge and misses the logic/
And loses his soul in the process/ obsessed with nonsense with a caricature that has no content/