Some important tips...

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• Text Messy --You may think you're being sly with "ILY," but what you're really doing is leaving a trail. Ask married Detroit Mayor Kwame Kilpatrick whose steamy texts to an equally married aide became painfully public.

• Cubicle Canoodling --Or, the work fling. Even if the bosses aren't reading your e-mails, there's no way this affair is going to stay private. After all, most of any given workday is devoted to distracting oneself from the task at hand and what's more interesting than gossiping about who's doing who?

• Family Feud --Sleeping with a member of his family (other than the one you're wedded to) is not only tacky, it's begging to get caught. And really, aren't holidays unpleasant enough? No one can forget Woody Allen and Soon Yi Previn.

• Teacher's Pet -- Debra Lafave and Mary Kay LeTourneau are but a couple of lady teachers who've experienced that most forbidden fruit -- their students. And since teenage boys aren't known for discretion, these ladies subsequently were outed, and punished, for their dalliances.

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