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tallboss876 wrote
9 days ago

hail

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djromie (Mzja Dj) wrote
October 15th

anyone dehya

djromie (Mzja Dj) wrote
October 15th

mi di ting up like7 again

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EMile38 wrote
October 5th

reggae riddims

Topic: Pilot Checklist

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Crazypickney

̿̿ ̿̿'̿'̵͇̿̿=(•̪●)=/̵͇̿̿/'̿̿ ̿ ̿ ̿

Status: Offline

Posts: 9753

Date: 15:21 08/05 2007

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After every flight, pilots fill out a form, called a gripe sheet which tells mechanics about problems with the aircraft. The mechanics correct the problems, document their repairs on the form, and then pilots review the gripe sheets before the next flight. Never let it be said that ground crews lack a sense of humor. Here are some maintenance complaints submitted by pilots and the solutions recorded by maintenance engineers. By the way, the airline these came from is the only major airline that has never, ever, had an accident.

Pilot: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
Engineers: Almost replaced left inside main tire.

Pilot: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough.
Engineers: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.

Pilot: Something loose in c**ckpit.
Engineers: Something tightened in c**ckpit.

Pilot: Dead bugs on windshield.
Engineers: Live bugs on back-order.

Pilot: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute descent.
Engineers: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.

Pilot: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
Engineers: Evidence removed.

Pilot: DME volume unbelievably loud.
Engineers: DME volume set to more believable level.

Pilot: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
Engineers: That's what friction locks are for.

Pilot: IFF inoperative in OFF mode.
Engineers: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.

Pilot: Suspected crack in windshield.
Engineers: Suspect you're right.

Pilot: Number 3 engine missing.
Engineers: Engine found on right wing after brief search.

Pilot: Aircraft handles funny.
Engineers: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious.

Pilot: Target radar hums.
Engineers: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.

Pilot: Mouse in c**ckpit.
Engineers: Cat installed.

Pilot: Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds like a midget pounding on something with a hammer.
Engineers: Took hammer away from midget

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STAINLESS

Wscript.Echo"Beam mi up" & stain.CName

Status: Offline

Posts: 4488

Date: 20:18 08/05 2007

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why they gotta be so long? no -one writes short jokes anymore..lmao __________________ **************Bavarian WiseWords*************** Lesson1 Put Jesus Christ first!! Lesson2 Success comes not from just what you know but who you know.