A single mother of one was passing by her daughter's bedroom when she saw, to her shock, the bed was nicely made and everything was picked up. Then she saw an envelope propped up prominently on the center of the bed. It was addressed, 'Mummy.' With the worst premonition, she opened the envelope and read the letter with trembling hands:


Dear Mummy: It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope with my new boyfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with you and Daddy. I've been finding real passion with Jason and he is so nice - even with all his piercings, tattoos, beard, and his motorcycle clothes. But it's not only the passion Mummy, I'm pregnant and Jason said that we would be very happy. He already owns a car (1979 Nissan) and has a stack of wood to start our house. He wants to have many more children with me and that's now one of my dreams too. Jason taught me that weed doesn't really hurt anyone and we'll be growing it for us and trading it with his friends for all the cocaine and ecstacy we want. In the meantime, we'll pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so Jason can get better; he sure deserves it!! Don't worry Mummy, I'm 15 years old now and I know how to take care of myself. Some day I'm sure we'll be back to visit so you can get to know your grandchildren.

Your daughter, Jena-Marie

PS: Mummy, none of the above is true. I'm over at the neighbour's house. I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than my report book which i just got. It's in my center drawer. I love you! Call when it is safe for me to come home.