File photos from left: Rihanna, One Third, Cobra, 'X-ALE (contributed)

Mek a tell yu 'bout friend, that's why mi no trust none a dem. Right now, ah me alone a roll, mi no need no 'frenemy' who ah go talk 'bout mi van no hot and dem nah drive, and mi know mi is a girl whofa mortgage never overdue yet. Mi ting sort out. Portmore, mi plan fi mek a one fly out soon, so mi a go miss oonu but ah just so, mi haffi clear mi head. SUSS Time!

ONE THIRD GANGSTER ANTHEM LARGE

The Garrison Anthem come in like it global now. The man dem go buss up Turks and Caicos wid the song last week, and dem still have the girls because dem lock two Valentine's Day concert. Miguel, ah now the girls dem over Portmore ah go mad over yu, because yu can sing fi dem song and now yu have the thug ting lock. Wha oonu a say? Next move, join the Empire?

BATTLE OF THE BOY GROUPs

Mi know di girls dem ago crazy dis summer if dem si six a di hottest man pon stage in a lyrical feud. Well, One Third a vibe a ting fi ansa di group wey name X-ALE, bout dem a di baddest. Di worl done know One Third and if X-ALE tink dem ago get it suh easy dem betta come good. Di air wave done full up wit X-ALE song but jus wait wen One Third put out fi dem. Den yuh goin to know who badder dan who. Promoter unno betta get dem early fi shows cuz a pure talk surrounding dem.

SHADDU RUFFA DAN NUFF A DEM

How some man nuh want to free up di youth, Shaddu song seh suh. Portmore jus memba sey a Sharlene fuss sey leggo di youth and stop try stiffling di man career. Right yah now di man a duh crazy recordin and release couple singles like, Badda Dan Dem and Pressures of Life. Titus mi love how yuh a tek him career to di nex level a yuh ave di platinum touch, NEERG Music gone a lead dis year.

FULL WHITE, FULL BLIGHT

How so much bad things happen rounda the Full White last week? People bruk inna Cobra X5, mash up the glass and tek out over $200,000 inna cash. Mi know Cobra is one of only three man with a 2008 bus pon the Portmore route, but why him have so much cash pon him on a weekend? And why him always ah get rob inna him owna community? Anyway, hope him get back him tings dem. Back to the event now, every minute light keep on a go way and even though dem say La Roose have generator fi the club, ah just blackout ting till the light come back and then go way again, the event just salt.

KARTEL GETS DIVORCED

What a way everybody shock say Mr Palmer ah get divorce, is a ting weh did hold down till it buss out last weekend. How the good good marriage just collapse so? Because him no have no visa? But why she never come look fi him regular a yard? And how this next man drop in so till she go breed fi a next man? It nuh look right but ah just so it set. Nuh worry bout a nex DNA cuz yuh was not there.

CAPLETON PREES DETERMINE?

Determine Science song buss and everybody ah talk 'bout it, crazy airplay pon radio and ting. Paula glad bag buss because her man hot again. But wait, the trouble just start. First Guidance shoot back after Determine wid a wicked song ah talk 'bout the famous story wid Determine, and now Capleton vex about the 'St Mary mi come from, yu shoulda know say a straight science land don' part and him plan fi clash Determine and end him career soon.

50,000 G MAFFIAH MIXTAPES ON THE STREET

How Kingston 6 Rekords ah go so hard? 50,000 CD ah gi weh free? It come in like dem come fi tek the business, worse Maffiah new tune Rising ah go so hard pon the Cranberry riddim. The whole ah Spanish Town and Portmore know say the yute wicked and him a de real ting. 2008 ah fi him year and him nah use the 'muss buss science'. Clean living, that him a defend. Big up DJ Weedim and Buss High.

HYPE DRESSING FI REGGAE ACADEMY

Ah pure hype ting a go gwaan this weekend, the industry players dem a go step out and show de whole world say we can do we own ting. Mi hear say Biggy and Audrey Goodas ah mek crazy money ah sew some incredible design fi the upcoming show, mi hear say ah some mad style and ting, everything unique. This is the big day for Steelie, and fi the aggregation of Clyde McKenzie, Josef Bogdanovich and Lloyd Stanbury, this is their defining moment in the sun.

NODDY LAUNCHES ALBUM

Speaking about Rising Stars, Noddy Virtue will launch his debut album next Monday at the Ranny Williams Entertainment Centre, with an autograph signing afterwards. It looks like Noddy out fi prove say ah really him shoulda win Rising Stars da year de. Big up Mr Wright, yu a pilot the career.

QUESTION TIME

Which big artiste tings ah rotten off the way him flash it all over the place? Mi hear dem girls ah talk de tings dem a Escape the other night.

Which artiste and which artiste ah bathe inna dutty water inna dem white draws? Who wine wid the monkey pon the hill top?

Why Sandra Lee dance rounda Mixing Lab flop the other night? She get a spending crowd but the sound did turn down low and if 50 people de de, nuff was there, but mi no understand why it just flap so?

Which big man girl on the side (who juck the best) pregnant and hell ah go pap a yard? It deep.

Ah true say Detention ah start back rounda Rebel T?

Junior Pinchers, mi hear say yu plan big show name Well Equipped wid Capleton, Queen Ifrica, Warrior King, Pinchers and a bag of big artiste on April 12. So weh de free ticket dem de? Yu fi mek sure say yu fans ah Portmore get some, zeen.

How Rihanna get her own national holiday inna Barbados and Bob Marley no get none inna Jamaica? Rihanna not even half as big as Bob Marley guitar string, weh dem feel like?

Baby Chris, mi love how the show dem a roll in, but when yu a come Portmore come endorse Congress Fridays?

Who is the new browning that the 'doc' is dating under the quiet?

Ah true say Deva still a hold a joy inna the Portmore lock-up despite everything?