>> > Your last name stays put. >> > The garage is all yours. >> > Wedding plans take care of themselves. >> > Chocolate is just another snack. >> > You can never be pregnant. >> > You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. >> > You can wear NO shirt to a water park. >> > Car mechanics tell you the truth. >> > The world is your urinal. >> > You never have to drive to another petrol station toilet because this one is just too icky. >> > You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. >> > Same work, more pay. >> > Wrinkles add character. >> > Wedding dress £2000. Tux rental-£100. >> > People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them. >> > The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected. >> > New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet. >> > One mood all the time. >> > Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. >> > You know stuff about tanks. >> > A five-day holiday requires only one suitcase. >> > You can open all your own jars. >> > You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. >> > If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend. >> > Your underwear is £4.95 for a three-pack. >> > Three pairs of shoes are more than enough. >> > You almost never have strap problems in public. >> > You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes. >> > Everything on your face stays its original colour. >> > The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. >> > You only have to shave your face and neck. >> > You can play with toys all your life. >> > One wallet and one pair of shoes, one colour for all seasons. >> > You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look. >> > You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife. >> > You have freedom of choice concerning growing a moustache. >> > You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes. >> > No wonder men are happier.