Everybody has a dog called Rover or Spot. I call my dog "Sex". When I went to city hall to
buy a license I told the clerk I wanted a license for Sex. He said "I'd like one too." But
then I said "This is a dog." He said he didn't care what she looked like. Then I said "You
don't understand I've had Sex since I was nine years old." He said "You must have been quite
a kid." When I got married and went on my honeymoon, I took the dog with me. I told the motel
clerk that I wanted a room for my wife, me and a special room for Sex. He said that every
room in the place was for sex. I said "You don't understand Sex keeps me awake at night." The
clerk said "Me too." One day I entered Sex in a contest, but before the competition began,
the dog ran away. Another contestant asked me why I was just standing there looking around.
I told him I had planned to have Sex in the contest. He told me that I should have sold my own
tickets. "But you don't understand," I said. I hoped to have Sex on T.V. He called me a show
off.

When my wife and I separated, we went to court to fight for custody of the dog. I said "Your
honor, I had Sex before I was married." The judge said "Me too." Then I told him that after I
was married Sex left. He said "Me too."

Last night Sex ran off again. I spent hours looking around town for him. A cop came over to me
and asked "What are you doing in this alley at 4 o'clock in the morning?" I said I'm looking
for Sex. ............ so i've got a case coming up Friday.