This priest is taking confession in the Catholic church very early one morning and he suddenly realizes that he has the screaming trots and has to go, like, right now. So he walks out the back door of the ornate little confession hut and snags the janitor and says, Hey, I gotta go to the bathroom real bad and its gonna take a few minutes, but then Ill be right back. You just sit in here until I get back and, if anybody comes in, after they confess, give them some Hail Marys to do and theyll never know the difference. Then the priest split for the holy can.

One or two people came in with the usual no-big-deal guilty stuff. The janitor gave them some Hail Marys to say, and that was it.

Then this guy goes into the confessional, all upset and all worked up and says, Oh Father, I really sinned last night. Last night a bunch of us went out after work and we all got falling down drunk. But thats not the bad part. They told me this morning that I was drunker than anyone and that I gave everybody a blow job. Im not even gay, Father, what shall I do?

Ooh, this was a toughy, the janitor needed to find the priest immediately for this one, so he told the guy to start reciting some prayers right now and that hed give penance shortly. The janitor opened the back door of the confession hut to look for the priest, but he was still in the john.

About then a choir boy came walking by, so the janitor pulled him aside and said, Quick, tell me. What does the priest give for a blow job?

The choir boy answered, Oh, we usually get a pat on the head and 2 snickers and a coke.